It’s PROM SEASON!
Over here in Dartmouth, where the radio station is located (we’re at 100 Main Street, if you ever want to pop by), some of the high schools are having their prom over the next couple weeks.
But what is such an exciting time for so many teenagers is actually an annual reminder of one of the worst things I ever did.
Now, let me preface this by saying… I could be a bit of an a-hole in High School. BUT IT WASN’T BECAUSE I *MEANT* TO BE!!
I was someone who was very uncomfortable with herself; I seemed outgoing, I was a theatre kid, everyone knew me and I guess in that way I had some ‘popularity’, but I *always* FELT like an outsider.
I was an introvert, I felt uncomfortable with most social interactions, and as a result I was awkward and a little bit weird. At least, I felt weird.
I understand these part of myself as an adult (in fact, I made a career out of understanding these parts of myself!), but as a teenager – before things like mental health, or neurodivergence, or being an omnivert/introvert/extrovert were mainstream concepts, or even talked about AT ALL – I basically just felt uncomfortable in my skin and in my brain most of the time, regardless of the person people THOUGHT I was.
This is not to excuse my actions, but just to help you understand a bit about who I was in 2002.
I often jumped from friend group to friend group. Any time I suspected people might be sick of me, I got out of there (and, since I was someone who felt weird most of the time, I assumed most people were sick of me FAST).
The friends I did have were in the grades above me, so after they graduated and I still had a year left of high school, I didn’t really have a solid ‘friend group’. That being said, I had a group that I sat with, talked to, and spent my time with in school, so it was one of those friends that I decided to go to prom with.
I had zero feelings for him, but these were the early Aughts; movies like American Pie made prom out to be some big ‘THING’ where you were gonna ‘get lucky’, so, I worried he was going to THINK something was gonna happen with us.
Prom was fine, but once we got to the after party, I started to actively avoid him.
I didn’t really feel like hanging out, I wanted to do my own thing, and I didn’t want to end up in an uncomfortable situation.
But he kept looking for me so, initially, I was discreetly avoiding him. However, I was 18 (and we were consuming alcohol) so what started out as ‘discreet’ became VERY OBVIOUS as the night went on.
THEN…I somehow ended up in a situation where I was talking to a guy that I had had a crush on since the first week of grade 9.
So, whenever someone would come and talk to us, I would tell them, “please don’t tell <my date’s name> that you saw me.”
I know… It was an a-hole move that ultimately backfired on me because people started going up to my date and telling him, “Melody is telling everyone she is avoiding you.”
Needless to say, he was not impressed.
But he was VERY articulate when he found me and told me off in front of my crush – and anyone else who was around.
He told me that I was a bad person; that had a huge impact on me.
It’s one thing for someone to tell you off, but it’s another for someone to look you in the eye and tell you that you are a BAD person.
So, here I am, 24 years later, and I still think of that Prom night as one of my biggest regrets from high school.
…my dress was pretty awesome though (in fact, I still have it!).
